Outcome Independence And Letting Go: Good, Bad, Who Knows?


Outcome Independence And Letting Go: Good, Bad, Who Knows?

Experience vs result. If you had to pick between the two, which would you choose? Outcome independence and letting go can help you find the healthy balance.

Imagine a world where you could navigate life’s ups and downs without being emotionally attached to the outcomes. A world where you could embrace the art of letting go and experience true freedom.

This may sound like a distant dream, but it’s closer than you think.

Many people struggle with the constant pressure to achieve specific results, whether in their personal or professional lives. This attachment to outcomes can lead to stress, anxiety, and a sense of failure when things don’t go as planned. But what if there was a better way?

Enter the concepts of Outcome Independence and Letting Go. By embracing these principles, you can learn to detach yourself from the need for specific outcomes and instead focus on the process and the experiences along the way. This important shift in mindset can lead to increased resilience, building more assertiveness, personal growth, and overall well-being.

In this blog post, we’ll explore the importance of Outcome Independence and Letting Go, and provide practical tips for incorporating these principles into your everyday life. Get ready to embark on a journey towards a more fulfilling and liberated existence.

What is Outcome Independence?

Outcome Independence is the idea that you are not emotionally attached to any specific outcome. It means that you are secure in yourself, independent of what happens to you. You are able to handle whatever occurs, keep moving, and continue growing. This mindset allows you to focus on your internal desires rather than being swayed by external factors, making you more resilient and less eager to please.

Remember, being outcome independent doesn’t mean neglecting manners or good social skills. Neglecting social norms, disregarding the feelings of others, or failing to consider the potential consequences of your actions won’t help you achieve anything you want out of life.

Outcome independence should ideally promote authenticity and respectful interactions, not selfishness or apathy. The goal is to be genuinely yourself, without overly worrying about the reactions of others, but still showing empathy, kindness, and respect.

How does Letting Go relate to Outcome Independence?

Letting Go is a technique that involves being aware of a feeling, allowing it to surface, staying with it, and letting it run its course without attempting to change it or do anything about it. It’s a way of channeling your mental, emotional, and physical energy in a productive manner. When combined with Outcome Independence, Letting Go helps you shift your focus from how things “should” have gone to what you can do now, enabling you to better cope with life’s challenges.

Can Outcome Independence and Letting Go improve mental health?

Yes, Outcome Independence and Letting Go can have a positive impact on mental health. By detaching from specific outcomes and focusing on the process, you can reduce stress and anxiety associated with the need for control and perfection. Furthermore, practicing Letting Go allows you to process emotions in a healthy way, leading to increased emotional resilience and overall well-being.

How can I maintain Outcome Independence in relationships?

Maintaining Outcome Independence in relationships involves focusing on your own personal growth, values, and well-being, rather than relying on your partner for validation or happiness. Some strategies to achieve this include setting personal boundaries, prioritizing self-care, engaging in individual hobbies and interests, and fostering open communication with your partner. By cultivating a sense of independence and self-worth, you can create a healthier and more balanced relationship dynamic.

How to Embrace Outcome Independence and Learn To Let Go

If you’re approaching a social situation with an outcome independent mindset, you would interact genuinely, express your ideas, and respect others without the fear of being judged or rejected. Regardless of the outcome of the situation, whether you’re praised or criticized, accepted or rejected, you would still feel content because you stayed true to yourself and acted with respect and kindness.

Ready to start your journey towards Outcome Independence and Letting Go?

Here are seven steps to help you detach from specific outcomes and embrace a more liberated mindset:

1. Make a commitment to let go

Decide that you want to embrace Outcome Independence and Letting Go in your life. This conscious decision is the first step towards breaking free from the chains of attachment to outcomes.

2. Feel the feelings

Allow yourself to fully experience your emotions without judgment or resistance. Acknowledge them and give them space to exist, but don’t let them control you.

3. Take responsibility

Recognize that you have control over your own thoughts, feelings, and actions. By taking responsibility for your reactions, you can begin to detach from outcomes and focus on what you can control.

4. Practice mindfulness

Cultivate a present-moment awareness through mindfulness practices such as meditation, deep breathing, or journaling. This will help you stay grounded and centered, regardless of external circumstances.

5. Practice self-compassion

Be kind to yourself as you navigate the process of letting go. Remember that it’s a journey, and it’s okay to stumble along the way. Treat yourself with the same compassion you would offer to a friend in a similar situation.

6. Focus on the process, not the outcome

Shift your attention from the end result to the journey itself. Enjoy the experiences, learn from them, and grow as a person, independent of the outcome.

7. Surround yourself with supportive people

Seek out friends, family members, or mentors who understand and support your journey towards Outcome Independence and Letting Go. Their encouragement and guidance can be invaluable in helping you stay on track.

Attaching ourselves to the outcome makes things more difficult.

It is not good or bad.

  • Approaching and saying hi to a stranger at a cafe can result in XXX or YYY?
  • Taking a picture of myself with fun friends at the beach will produce XXX when I post it online.
  • Asking my director for a raise in an assertive and influential way resulted in XXX.
  • Inviting my team out for a social event ended up being really XXX!

Experience vs result. If you had to pick between experiencing these without ever knowing the result (like above). Or only knowing the result without having the experience, which would you choose? This can even be asked about watching the experience, like in a movie.

Most people I speak with seem to value the experience of it more. We truly don’t know if the result (outcome) is even good or bad long term.

For example: A rejection for a raise could very well lead you to leaving that company for a better company where you end up learning unique skills that enables you to start an innovative startup.

Or an approach of a stranger could lead to a phone number, but then to a 5 year romantic relationship that ends horribly and you “wasted” 5 years.

These can switch back and forth to what we perceive as good or bad.

For instance, after that horrible 5 year relationship that person finds a soulmate in their ex’s coworker that they never would have met without that bad relationship which leads them to live happily ever after.

My point is a great outcome from an interaction doesn’t mean that it’s good long term and a bad outcome (getting rejected) may have saved you long term from a shitty situation.

Don’t worry too much about the outcome.

That worry can enhance and put fuel on the fire on our natural anxiety.

Especially in those big extra important moments.

Then it becomes much more difficult to do in the first place.

I’m not saying to go to the extreme in always being wary about a good reaction and being relieved when something doesn’t move forward socially! But it could make socializing more easy if you can mitigate some of the emotions that are stopping you by using this outlook. Bad isn’t bad and good isn’t good, be open like a good scientist.

Social skills are learnable and you can get really good at them, as we have learned here at Jaunty, but the skills are there so you can enjoy and learn from the experience with other people.

Unlock Your Potential with Outcome Independence

Embracing Outcome Independence and Letting Go can be a transformative experience, but it can also be challenging to navigate on your own. That’s where Jaunty comes in.

Our experienced social skills coaches can provide you with personalized guidance and support to help you overcome obstacles and achieve your goals.

Working with a social skills coach can help you:

  • Identify and address personal barriers to Outcome Independence
  • Develop practical strategies for Letting Go in various aspects of your life
  • Improve communication and relationship-building skills
  • Boost self-confidence and resilience in the face of challenges
  • Enhance your overall well-being and personal growth
  • Create a more fulfilling and liberated life experience

Don’t let the burden of attachment to outcomes hold you back from achieving your full potential. Embrace Outcome Independence and Letting Go with the support of Jaunty’s expert coaches and unlock a world of possibilities. Get started on your journey towards a more resilient, confident, and liberated you today.


Eric Waisman

Eric Waisman

Founding Instructor

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