Innuendo is a hint. It’s when you say one thing out loud and let the other person figure out the second meaning on their own. In flirting, a little innuendo is a way to be playful and a bit suggestive without saying anything outright, and when both people are on the same wavelength it can be a lot of fun.
Written by Eric Waisman, Founder of Jaunty | Social Skills Coach | 15 Years Teaching Interpersonal Communication
What Does Innuendo Mean?
An innuendo is an indirect remark that hints at something without stating it. The word comes from Latin, roughly “by nodding” or “by hinting,” which is a pretty good description of how it works. You nod in a direction and let the other person look.
It gets used two ways, and it’s worth knowing both. The first is the one people usually mean when they search for it: a suggestive, often sexual double meaning, said with a wink. The second is older and less fun: a sly hint that damages someone’s reputation, like a coworker saying “well, he does leave early a lot” about the guy who just got promoted. Same basic move, it’s just the intent that changes, and this page is about the flirty kind.
Innuendo Examples
A few everyday ones, from mild to cheeky:
- You’re building IKEA furniture together and they say “I’m really good with my hands.” Nobody’s talking about the bookshelf anymore.
- They mention they’re a morning person. “Good to know. I’m more of a late-night person.” Said with a pause and a small smile.
- After a long day: “I could really use someone to help me unwind.” It could mean a drink. It could mean something else. That’s the point.
- The gossip kind, in a sentence: “Her comments about his ‘long lunches’ were full of innuendo.”
Notice none of these are explicit. If you have to explain it, the moment’s gone.
What Is Sexual Innuendo?
Sexual innuendo is a remark with a hidden sexual meaning sitting under a normal-sounding sentence. A double entendre is close cousins with it. A double entendre is a phrase that literally has two readings, one of them usually sexual. Innuendo is a little broader, it can be the tone, the pause, the eyebrow, not just the words.
Context is everything here. The same sentence is playful on a third date and creepy with someone you just met at a work event. So before you worry about the perfect line, think about who you’re saying it to and how well you actually know them.
From the Jaunty Coaching Vault: 200% in Class, 50% in Real Life
In our classes we over-exaggerate on purpose. When people practice playful, suggestive flirting, we push it to 200% so they can feel where the edge is in a safe room. Out in the world, you dial it back to about 50%. Innuendo works the same way. The version in your head is always stronger than the version that should leave your mouth, especially early on.
Knowing what innuendo is is the easy part. Pulling it off live, with timing that feels natural and not forced, is the hard part. If you want to know where your flirting and conversation skills actually stand, take our free 60-second quiz. Take the quiz →
How to Use Innuendo When You’re Flirting
Think of it like a rest in music. The drummer who hits every beat is exhausting to listen to, it’s the space between the notes that makes a groove. Innuendo is the note you don’t play. You leave a little gap and let the other person fill it in, and when they do, you’ve both shared a small private joke.
Then I want you to watch what comes back. If they laugh and toss something back at you, that’s a green light, the two-way street is open. If you get a polite smile and a subject change, that’s your answer too, and it’s not a big deal. Drop it, move on, no need to explain yourself.
This is learnable, it’s not a personality trait you either have or don’t. One of our students, David K., put it like this:
“I’ve always been comfortable professionally, but dating was another story. Jaunty gave me the tools to flirt naturally and confidently. I’m now dating someone amazing—I never saw this coming.”
— David K., Entrepreneur
Do
1. Be witty, not crude.
The fun is in the cleverness. A smart double meaning gets a laugh, a blunt one gets a wince.
2. Gauge the other person’s comfort level first.
Build some rapport before you get suggestive. Innuendo lands when there’s already a bit of trust and playfulness between you.
3. Use it sparingly.
One well-timed line is charming. Five in a row and it starts to feel like that’s the only thing on your mind.
4. Let them in on the joke.
A small smile or a pause tells them you know exactly what you said. That’s what separates playful from awkward.
Flirting like this is a skill you get better at by doing it, not by reading about it. It’s kind of like learning tennis from a book. That’s what the Jaunty Gym is for, live practice every week with a coach and real people, so you can find your timing somewhere safe first.
Don’t
1. Don’t be overly explicit.
Once it’s spelled out, the hint is gone and so is the fun.
2. Don’t make the other person uncomfortable.
If they go quiet or change the subject, take the hint yourself. Pushing past that is where innuendo turns into something nobody enjoys.
3. Don’t rely only on innuendo.
A little goes a long way. Real curiosity about the other person does way more for attraction than any clever line.
Want to know if your flirting is actually landing, the timing, the playfulness, the reading-people part? Take our free 60-second quiz and get a quick snapshot of where you’re strong, where you’re not, and what to practice next. No email required to start.
